年度沙雕新闻大赏，国内的笑到掉渣，国外的笑到模糊，够你笑一年！
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声明：本文翻译为沪江英语原创
未经授权禁止转载
马上又要过年了，一年的时间又过去了。
这一年，不用说，新闻肯定很多；但没想到的是，沙雕新闻也这么多。
这一盘点才知道，人啊，真是什么事都做得出来、什么事都赶报道。
我们为你整理了50多条这一年的中外超级沙雕新闻，还做了英汉互译，赶快来看一下吧：
Passanger's fart was too pungent that it made the flight make an emergency landing. And the passanger got banned from flights for a lifetime.
1998-born-lad asked his teacher for a day off to have hair transplant. The consellor's opinion: case being true.
Someone asked the police: "Officer, please check whether I'm an escaped prisoner or not." The officer checked and found out she was one.
9-year-old boy drew his own fable stories. Mother showed encouragement by publishing them with the boy's own New Year gift money.
Little turtle was retrieved 322 metres away from home after it had run away for half a year.
切斯特菲尔德路面发现黑色Bra。
纽卡斯尔的沃伯顿工厂起火，闻起来像烤土司。
Man kept committing theft for 10 years just to get into the prison chorus.
Thief broke into house with shoes off and hid under the bed. He got caught because his feet stank too much.
Japan found a national treasure handed down from ancient times. A Chinese lady revealed that she made it and the price was only 80 RMB per one.
Daughter cried into faint twice after she heard her mother was in ICU due to a traffic accident. Later, she went home and found her mother watching TV there.
Man watched a residential building burn and made jokes about it. He soon found the building to be his own home.
警方：偷车嫌疑犯开着偷来的车到庭受审。
Woman who weighed 90kg tried to hang herself after she got drunk. And she survied it because she was too heavy and the rope broke.
Kid reminded the uncle that they were at the wrong kindergarten. The uncle said: Don't try to skip school. Get in.
3 brothers took flight to Shenyang to commit theft and got arrested. They revealed that they thought the Northeast was underdeveloped and thus had no surveillance.
罗瑞商场的驯鹿玩偶放错音频，圣诞节大唱黄歌。
Man fell into a hole when searching for his dog. And he found the dog in that hole.
Deadbeat pretended to be in a coma in the court but couldn't help laughing at the judge's lame joke.
Man got summoned to the police station and immediately started doing cleaning after he got there. His reason: I wanna make a good impression.
海灵岛一位名叫耶稣的歹徒砸毁教堂窗户，然而随后出家。
Longtime lottery buyer mistook his number with the winning one, fainted in bliss and got sent to the hospital.
Woman spent more than 8,000 RMB in 15 years to collect 300 cellphones. And she charge them for pleasure when she has nothing to do.
Drug dealer hid drugs in his rectum and held his shit for 22 days. The police put the process on live.
未遂劫匪扔砖头砸玻璃，反被砖头弹回砸晕。
店主告诉劫匪晚点再来抢，劫匪照做，遂被抓。
Thief broke into a safe and found 5.05 million but only stole half of it 'cause it's too heavy.
Man got praised for finding 5,000 RMB on the road and handing them to the police. He got back home and found out that's his own money.
Wife threatened her husband with divorce to make him do body odor surgery. The husband refused and said it was his mother's smell.
Thief climbed a 33-floor building with bare hands. His reason: people who live on high floors must have a lot of money.
女子的律师声称：血液酒精浓度高是因为咬外套。
巴黎的首家裸体餐厅关门，因为没生意。
警长为对抗犯罪，树立纸板人警员。
Old woman hung 300 mirrors on her balcony because the opposite apartment looked too evil. And the opposite hung their mirrors in revenge.
Grandpa picked a wrong grandson from the kindergarten and even took him to the hospital and finished an injection there.
Persistent thief kept stealing ham for 34 years and got arrested every year.
Man called the police and told them to make the train wait for him for 20 minutes.
好奇的猫被捕鼠器卡住头。
监控录像拍到男子舔门铃长达3小时。
Woman went to jail for running a casino. And she bought the police a pennants after she got released because she lost 15kg in jail.
Suspect kept singing rap in the court and got his mouth taped by the judge.
Thief got terrified after stealing 700,000， so he gave the money back with 2000 more in return.
嫌犯藏在教堂锅炉房里被锁，报警求救。
劫匪想抢银行却临阵退缩，随即要开个户，然而没有身份证。
警方通报：甜甜圈店被抢，劫匪是吃甜甜圈大赛的冠军。
Wife cheated on her husband. And the man gave the other man more than 200,000 to learn how to flirt with his own wife.
警方告诫偷手机的贼：不要接视频通话。
警官拨通被盗手机，趁嫌烦接通时截图并将其抓住。
数名女子越狱后去玩密室逃脱游戏，在逃脱密室时被抓。
显然24小时内连续两次从警察鼻子底下逃脱是不可能的。
商店窃贼用橡皮泥封住摄像头，留下清晰指纹。
Kid was too slow when doing homework. And the 33-year-old mother got too angry that she got hospitalised for cerebral infarction.
College student traveled across 8000 kilometres to get back home and found the original home already torn down. His family forgot to tell him that.
~~~
好了，这么多野生段子恐怕够我笑一年了。
希望明年还有这么多沙雕新闻可以盘。
福 利 时 间新的一年，英大为大家准备了新年礼物
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